Life's Salvation (You know who you are) lol

11:37am: Spring Break!
its been raining torrents out there today and yesterday, huh? well, hope none of your basements are flooding because of the constant rain storms. but anyway, this post is so far on my spring break.

two weeks ago, my mom was involved in a car accident. shes ok, but the aztek was a lil banged up. nothing too serious though. the front bumper was mostly damaged with the right light busted. yeah, it was really scary for her. shes so much more cautious now, its a lil annoying, but hey, i can understand. so, anyway.

speaking of cars, i got a new car! well, my family did. its not gonna be mine in the future either... rawr. we got an Accura TL. its a pretty sweet ride with cool features. it has an XM radio which means no commericals and strictly music! yes! (now only if i can find a alternative station... hmmm) also, it has a built-in bluetooth capability. my dad's fone benefits from it but mine doesnt which sucks badly. its not like he uses his fone much or has tons of people calling him or anything. but whatever, my rant stops there... or else, you guys would never hear the end of it.. hehehe

tennis has been very interesting too. i played several challenge matches with mike and joe and well, so far right now, im managing 5th, which i believe is terrible cuz i wanna play singles (#1-4) and not get stuck with doubles (#5-10). but at this rate, tomorrow is our first official match of the season and its away at st. mary's in annapolis. funfun.. we have to show up at school tomorrow at 2 so we can leave for annapolis. of course, the entire game is in question with the current weather we've been having... that would make the second game thats been rained out so far. last wed was supposed to be our first match at home against Lutheran but that got rained out. I have mixed feelings about our match tomorrow, having two sides that either want it canceled or scheduled normally cuz 1: i want to play singles, not doubles and at the moment, im playing doubles. 2. i want to get this season started already! hehe so, yeah.. im just waiting for the next day to come along here...

holy thursday... we had an hour early dismissal. there was this phenomenal singer from one of my teacher's church. i was actually in awe when she sang. also, i was one of the readers for the stations of the cross. and from reports from other people, i was the best one that read cuz i was loud and clear. heh, go figure! i was pretty much proud of myself when i heard it. (though, i never really truly believed it. >_<;;) anywho, i loved doing it anyway.

friday: Iceworld "Icecapades"
another great night for me indeed. i think im really getting the edge with skating.. still need to work on braking though.. oww.. anywho, i went with my new "gang" composed of juniors. (for once) course, this is where things pick up. course, on behalf of two people asking me to keep me this underwraps, i wont get into details and mention names involved in this terrible incident. so, anyway, besides the gang, charles, tina, and several others were there. it was a shocker not to see allie or tim there! really, it was! lol it was nice to see tina again, course it would have been better if i still wasnt scared to talk to her.. *shakes head* ive been feeling like theres some sort of resentment between us.. i want to be friends again. i miss her. the first hour of ice-skating wasnt so bad until i ran into someone and fell. i also found out that my friend eric had this huge cut on his left leg from running into a sharp piece of ice.. ouch. >_< everything was ok untili noticed, being the observant person that i am, that the girl with us and a close of friend of mine were nowhere to be found. i asked sean if he knew. nah, no luck. soo, i found out that they went out together to get a bite to eat. it sounded like trouble to me. soon eventually, i saw the two of them again. however, a lil bit later, things got drastically worse. the guy that went out with the girl got dumped and he was so depressed over it. he said he was being used the entire time. and boy, i knew where he was coming from. trust me, those feelings are hard to withstand. i tried to help him but he skated off.. i lost track of him in the mass crowd of ice-skaters. i was panicking so much that i was afraid he was gonna do something drastic. i skated like never before in search for him.i could not let someone hurt or attempt to hurt themself on my watch. soon enough, i did find him and i shared my own sob story of my life. we both got really close afterwards and we're awesome friends now. im glad to have helped him in his time of need.


easter.. hehe, well, that was an interesting day. we went to mass at st.francis where it was soooo croweded. didnt really see people i knew but it didnt matter to me. when we finally got out, we headed to PA and we used the accura to help break it in. well, we did help to break it in, but the main objective was to shop at the outlets... which most of them were closed when we got there...lmao so, yeah, we joyrode pretty much that day...lol well, that was pretty much so far.. laters!

3:19pm: ah, finally, ive caught up to where i am presently.. ah yes, one thing i absolutely need to mention.. im finally back online! hurray! (and boo for some of you...) This week has been really awesome for me as a junior. it was ring ceremony and dance week. hehe so i guess being a junior does pay off. i got my ring wednesday night. course, i really got there late thnx to my parents picking me up late and my inability to drive officially... rawr. i did manage to get there in time though which was good (unlike some others i know..). the ring ceremony was really cool. there was the story behind the creation of the school ring and the rivers of candles flowing throughout the auditorium. I also got an "evil" picture of my friend, tom. hehehe then we had a slide show of all the juniors following the ceremony. i heard when my pic showed up that i got quite the reaction. oi.. following the next morning, we had a "breakfast" specifically for the juniors. well, technically, they were really feeding us fruit and leftovers from last night...yeah.. some breakfast. then, we had a day off yesterday cuz we were cool like that.. haha. thats about it for the news on the junior front.

tennis has been very dramatic and emotional this week. after all, this is the week where the cuts are being made.. six people are going to be cut out of 18 to make a team of 12 tennis players. (thats for those who are terrible at math..haha) course, joe hit me in the face with a tennis ball using his tennis racket. note to self: will kill him when I can. >__> my friends, henry, brandon, will, and kevin furst were the unfortunate ones to get cut from the team 1st. then, there were three people left: Craig, Romaine, and Ollie. we had tennis practice on our day off but it was ok because it was a really nice day. i didnt mind as long as the weather cooperated. this is where i lost my doubles match when i was playing with a new hampshire transfer student, jefff harloe. gosh, he sucked ass that day. we lost 5-6, 5-6.*shakes head* i coulda probably won if i played against the two opponents by myself... humph. oh well... cant do anythinga bout it cept redeem myself later. We have our first tennis match at home against Lutheran. Hope i can play #4 singles this year...

My girlfriend is down here in MD right now.. she is staying at my friend, matt's house. i got to hang out with her for like the entire morning and early into the afternoon. we both had lots of fun just being with each other and enjoying each other's company. She gave me a copy of Meteora and a multi-variety cd. I get to see her again tonight at ring dance... i cant wait!

so, yeah... im done with this post. adios people!

2:24am: Blast of a Weekend
well... more updations on my life here on current events (as well as recent ones i forgot to mention)... (as if you guys didnt have enough to read about as it is lolol)

referring to the most recent events, in addition to my tennis escapades, ive also been playing table tennis with the faculty and fellow students. ive been improving and playing decently for a person who hasnt played seriously for a looong while. i finally beat my teacher-rival, mr. maynard, in a game of ping-pong, 21-19. whew, that was quite the game indeed.

well, friday was a very good day indeed. i finally got my laptop, my new com, a new monitor, and two printers! geez and i thought this day would never come. my family managed to spend under a $1000 for all of these cuz of the sale at CompUSA. hehe it was a good deal for sure.

also, after i got the coms, i was invited to go ice-skating with the guys at iceworld. bill, eric, jeff, pat, and sean were there and we all had a blast. course, we werent the only JC ppl there though..Liz, Kim, and Christina G. were there too, but somehow, i kinda figured I would see them there because i always do. However, i didn't expect to see allie and the rest there too. i was kinda feeling left out that they didnt invite me or something, but those feelings didnt last too long. maybe for a second. hehe thats me for ya. However, that wasnt even the end of it. There was another group that i also recognized (one person actually) known as my friend katrina. she was the one that matched me up with my 1st gf and i had no idea she was going to be there. i was being completely harassed by her... geez.

i was drifting mostly between the sophs and the juniors. I had such a great time reminscing about the memories i had in iceworld and for once in my life, they were all viewed positively...weird, huh? lol this was jeff's first time ice-skating and he was a bit rusty and all, but after a while, he was really getting a hang of it for sure! we promoted him from just 'jeff' to 'big jeff'. occasionally, i ran into liz, christina, and kim. however, i never saw katrina while i was ice-skating (a good thing). i listened to the music and usually coordinated my movements to the beats. it was def an awesome night.. course, there were some shockers (most of them bad) that i stumbled upon.. and i was pretty shaken up cuz of them.. not really gonna get into details here... so yeah that was pretty much it for friday night.

saturday... i woke up really late as usual cuz its the weekend. of course, we went back to CompUSA to settle some problems with the rebates on the coms we bought the night b4. Then, we went to target where i finally found the Yu-gi-oh cards i was looking for such a long time, the Dragon's Roar Structure Deck. Afterwards, the family and i went to the movies at the Avenue at White Marsh. We watched Be Cool, the movie sequel to Get Shorty. Afterwards, we got to eat at White Marsh Mall and ate some japanese food. i also got some great deals with Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. I finally got home and was so tired from everything...

Sunday was just a blast. i went over to my friend kate's house for her bday party. we had tons of pizza and cheese sticks and we played with marbles... lotsa, lotsa marbles! course, we all had fun torturing our friend katie with all our camera fones... mwahaha! (fear the camera fone!) we all watched Dodgeball and we all had tons of laughter echoing throughout the house. well, that was pretty much it my weekend there...

9:10am: Back to updating... arrgh!
well, geez, i really need to update, huh? well, a lot has happened in such a short time. so expect this post to be a really loooong one, ok? i'm gonna give you the general overview of whats been going on. still, you have been warned. i guess i'll start off with tennis.

I just finished my tennis league called the Red League. It's for the elite tennis players that prove their worth state-wide. since i was a latecomer (two matches late to be exact), i was given last out of the guys (8th). course, by the time i was actually getting the hang of things, i was playing pretty well above my rank. maybe i could have passed for 6th, perhaps even 5th. My record this season was beyond anything ive ever managed. my record was 16-2. the only reason i have such a high record of wins is because i had to mostly play twice for the team due to the lack of players at times. heh, i was declared MVP for the team cuz i made such a contribution to the team. lol i lost one singles and one doubles match and it was both to the same team, Greenspring in Baltimore Co. Overall, our entire team's record was 12-2 for the entire season. we did pretty well. my team made it all the way to the championship just recently. it was too bad that we lost it to Greenspring at the championship. Greenspring was responsible for our two losses too. geez... oh well, c'est la vie. we'll try harder next year. so, moving on... tennis season has officially started for me at school. currently, im playing #4 and i might be playing that position in the end unless i beat my friend, adam cranford, at a challenge match for the #3 slot. so far though, its been pretty cold and the courts werent in really the best conditions to play but we tried to anyway. i have a pretty good idea who is going to make the team and who is not. anyway, we need 12 people so there might be some unnecessary players in my eyes. *shrug* i hope that our team will make it all the way to the championship this year and for many more years to come.

on to other issues.. i finally made peace with my 1st ex-gf, chrissy, and we're friends once more and starting to talk to each other regularly. im glad that I could still hold on to our friendship. to me, friendship is a far more important thing than almost anything else. course, it cant happen all the time, can it...? *sigh* anyway, im just glad that everything is ok for us now. im just hoping i can make peace with my other ones too... i miss everything of a friendship that i had with them...

i also found out that several of my friends' relationships have changed and being so oblivious as i am...hehe i just found out like in the last couple of days. my friend tom is going out with my other friend katie. theyve been going out for about two weeks or so b4 i found out... (yup, im oblivious, alright. ) my friends bruce and john have broken up with their gfs due to circumstances beyond their control. well, actually, my friend bruce hasnt really given up on his gf yet and neither has she.. hahaha. its a funny sight really. saw also the promise ring he bought for her too.. wowee! but yeah, its such a weird (and dangerous) sight from where ive been witnessing all this. i hope that everything will be alright for the two of them and that nothing happens to any of them... sean, another friend of mine, is going out with a girl he's been so dead scared to ask out for about months on end. geez, every1's going out these days... its crazy. also, i believe that my friend pat and lauren are going out. if they're not, they should be because they make such a cute couple... hahahaha trust me, if you could only see what goes on, you'd understand what im saying..

i wish i had a lot more to say about the play 42nd St. but i really dont. i didnt get to see it because of my confirmation retreat and the tennis playoffs that were going on at the exact same weekend. i really wanted to see it too! *sigh* all i can say that is everyone did a great job preparing and finally performing to their audiences. i've heard some great things that i missed out on...arrgh.. oh well..

my social life has been boosted a lot lately.. but yea, ive been over so many friends houses the last couple of weekends. i just realized how poorly furnished my house really is. *shrug* oh well, guess i gotta work on it before anyone should ever come to my house. >__>;; i went over to my friend, eric's house, for a poker game several days ago. i didn't do so well in terms of poker, but hey, i had tons of fun being the poorest gambler to come out of there! ^_^; also, i went to my friend heiidi's house for a lil get-together with a couple of ppl from our group. had tons of fun (and sugar while we were at it..) over there. it was a very fun time of the truth game by spinning the poker chips carousel. sooo weird... oh yeah, i also went to my friend dave's house for a bit of halo 2 action. i sucked being the worst xbox player there... *shrug* but... i did hav fun with the ps2 and the n64. beating the supposed "unbeatable" player of soul caliber 2 eight times straight was very entertaining. lmao!

Finally, onto current events... yeesh. ring dance is finally on its way and i can see alana once again! yayness! i simply cant wait! ok, i'll calm down now. my friend matt, the sole person responsible for me meeting her, isnt really as enthusiastic as i am though. i will update as soon as i can with details about that. many people are interested to meet her too.. dont know if its benign or not but i guess i'll find out soon, right? it should be a really fun night.

well, thats pretty much it. yeah, a big doozy of a post huh? i applaud those who actually took the time to read this entire thing... thanks, it means a lot to me. ciao for now!

3:25pm: post-exams fallout >_>;
well, finally, exams are over and done with. geez, i was wrying bout them so much that i found out i really didnt need to wry after all. i jus found out my grades too. *whew* i got a 98 for church history, 97 for US History, 95 for chemistry, 91 for Algebra 2, 91 for Hnrs. Spanish 3, 90 for Creative Writing, and an 82 for English 3. (curse english...rawr) i did pretty well too semester wise but i think u all have had enuff of me bragging and al.. hehehe XD so, yea, im pretty much recovering from shock of the grades and all. and ive been pulling off all-nighters here and there with alana. so much fun. ^_^ course, in the morning, i hav trouble enuff as it is trying to sing with chorus.. *weak laugh* so, been hearing news bout ppl here and there. and it seems that i might go to a party at alana's soon. shud b very interesting. *cough* also, theres a possibility i might b going to las vegas with her and her family. nuff said. *sneaky smile* pretty much all i really need to say. cya guys!

3:21pm: post-christmas break post
hey guys! im back! I kno, long time no post, huh? Yea, plz excuse me for jumping around a lot on this post. hehe I need to catch up on a whole lot of things so imma skip the formalities for now, k? ok, lets get reading now! XD

Christmas break was a blast in general. I went to a lot of parties during break and hung out with a lot of friends. o yea, i hav a gf! shocker! O_O hehehe her name’s alana and she is the best girl ive ever known since b4 the summer even began. im not really gonna go into details between us but lets jus say shes a lot lik me when it comes to emotions and all. *shifty eyes* I didn’t think it was possible but hey, im not complaining here! XB im glad I found sum1 who is passionate as I am. I jus hope I don’t screw things up. *crosses fingers* but moving on, I talked to her for pretty much at least 9 hours each night over break and occasionally falling aslp on the fone. (allie, shush lol) its too bad tho that she livs so far away from me. (new jersey to be exact) we keep talking to each other every school night at least for about 3 hours. yea, we’ve gotta be insane, I kno. we’ve def made plans to see each other during the Martin Luther King weekend as well as President’s weekend next month. ok, moving on to other things in my life.

im officially done being emo all the time.. (cept in the mornings cuz well, getting 5 hours of slp is not enuff sumtimes.... >___>) so in general, my Christmas break was pretty good. I called sum ppl and wished them a happy new yr and a merry Christmas. Sum answered bak and sum didn’t bother to.

9:13pm: update b4 christmas
hmmm... where i can start? theres so much to write about, idk where to start. well, right now, im at my friend's house typing all this up.. yeesh. tho, i have heard news that i might probably get a laptop soon... thats really good news for me. plus, on another positive note, i will get a new cell fone soon wich will most likely have mobile IM. but yeah, back to wat happened this week.

pat schaefer got caught trying to give skimpy clothes to sarah murray and omg, it was so hilarious when he got caught by mr. perry. he got sent to mr. piercy and got a demerit for it. we all cudnt stop laughing. i also made a surprising discovery when i found out my friend played duel monsters. he has an increidible dueling deck. nuff bout that tho. moving on, i got off yesterday and u public skoolers didnt! hah!!! anyway.. umm, yesterday, i had an hour-early dismissal and i had to stay until 3:30.. eeeeshhh.. so, i rode around bel air seein how far i can get around. i def did get far. course, it was getting a tad cold and well, it was about time for me to leave for tennis. and then, at the end of my tennis lesson, i saw my frnd seand and his sister there. i was lik omfg, what are u doing here??? it was a real shock. so, yeah, im not quite sure what this christmas will hav in store for me.. im hoping that i can talk to sum friends wile im online this short time. cya guys til then!

9:52am: updation time! w00t for all of you.
Geez, I really need to update these days.. and what a time for my com to break down.. *mumbles* oh well, here goes. This is starting from last Friday.

Friday: Battle of the Bands

Well, Friday wasn’t so bad cuz I got my frnd Joanna to go with me to the battle of the bands. Shes really cool to hang out with and well, I haven’t seen her in a while so this was a way to talk to her and catch up on things. Basta was giving me such a hard time about inviting Joanna cuz hes like that. *cough* it was really cool seeing coleman play the drums in his band and Joanna cudnt help but drool over him. Long story…>___> allie and charles came too which was really really awesome. Course, they left after there was little stuff to do. There was free pizza there.. hey that’s at least one good news. Haha hmm, well, sarah murray was there too and lets jus say whenever shes there, things always get interesting.

3:24pm: UPDATE PART 2
Monday: well, back to school after a 4-day weekend. lol Thanksgiving was pretty cool since i had some friends over and all. i got to talk to steph after a looong time since we last talked. it was good to hear her voice. now, back to monday... people were really mad at George for losing to me in tennis cuz now, the coconut dance wud disappear.. (cept for one person.. i still need to show that person *cough*) so, yeah, it was very amusing to hear people beg for it. lolol plus, i got to try out my new racket that i bought sunday. i hit lotsa bad shots with it but thats exepcted cuz i still need to get used to it and all..

Tuesday: I found out that there was a Battle of the Bands on friday night. still trying to figure out whether to invite some people i know or not. its hard.. oh yeah, it marks the one year milestone as well. only three people including myself know what i mean by that.

Wednesday: wow, it was a very wacked out day indeed. i was helping out my friend anna with her chem hw cuz she doesnt really get it that fast like me. >__> so, yeah, i was helping her out when out of the blue, she said: "God, I hate Chemistry!!" hehehe, our chemistry teacher was right there when she said that. so, yeah, i was also hanging out with juniors too. ( a shocker for those who really know me.. shuttup, allie. *ahem*) so, yeah, i got to try out my racket again for the third time and i think im getting the hang of it now. just need to hit the tennis ball more precisely. so, i think im caught up now. lol catch ya guys later!

3:02pm: UPDATE PART 1 lol
Saturday: Quite the Busiest Day I'll ever have... >__>

well, lets get this started now shall we? well, i recently volunteered to be color-guard for the band because I really had nothing to do and felt like doing it. *shrug* so, yeah, i was marching with the maryland flag in the Avenue at White Marsh. I was really nervous cuz i had no idea who was watching us.. ( i was really concerned with people that i used to know being there..) i kinda fell outta beat when i was marching but i didnt do too bad.. then, after i went back home for another hour or so, i went back to school because there was a chorus workshop concerning an acapella (no music) girl group from Ithaca College. WOW! They were really goood!! esp the beatboxer. kinda reminded me of someone. they sung sum songs i knew and they sung My Immortal!! O_O i was really impressed! so, yea, we worked with them for a while with a song: Alone by Heart. me and hugh were the only ones doing the parts... hahaha so after a practice of about 2 hours, we went back home for another hour or so before we came back for our concert. yeah, HYO was also going and i really regretted that I missed it... arrrgh. i heard they got an encore for Pirates of the Carribean. rawr altho, i had such a fun time singing with that group and learning new songs. I even bought their cd because I'm like that. lol so, yeah, the only thing i regret is not getting a recording of the group's version of My Immortal. sooo, i guess thats it for this post.

Sunday: saw Allie at church.. pretty much. lol

Tuesday: Tennis Death Match

A grudge match that is expected to be the "best" i'll ever have...yeah, my friend george challenged me to a match where if i lost, i wud have to do the coconut dance on demand for a month. (that wud kill me if i will lose..) however, if i win, i will banish the coconut dance forever unless i will it to come back. there will probably one more instance (at most two) where i will do it again willingly, but hey, im not telling u guys when. lol

Wednesday: The grudge match.

well, to say it simply, i won. lol the score was 2-6, 6-1, 6-2. the only reason i was playing so bad was cuz the balls were really dead and wudnt bounce properly and the ground was wet. i had to be careful not to make a split in the process of getting a ball.. *cough* george cud only talk trash talk to get to me but had no skill to work with. so, simply said, thats all i need to say. hahaha

11:15am: i really need to update these days...
Friday: omfg, that was so hilarious! XD pat schaefer was getting beat up by kelly. He had no chance watsoever. She pinned him down easy.. and she was smaller than him too!! haha and there was this uneasy feeling that was spurring in me.. It was raining outside and well, I love to walk in the rain… preferably alone. So, I went outside and just took a stroll around the campus… it has been a while since ive ever had some time to myself lately. And well, it was a very good feeling… usually it was a negative feeling and leads to more emo’ness.. but not in this case. Afterwards, I talked with sarah murray, cory, and several others. Then, I simply went home.

Sunday: well, it was the second tennis league match that I was involved in. this time it was in Perring Racquet Club. That night, I was playing doubles and well, I was preferably more familiar with doubles because of my past performances and experiences last tennis season. I played w. someone from CMW and well, he was a very good net player, lemme tell u that. My scores were 6-3, 7-5. afterwards I got to play with marc allinson… damn, he was not playing well at all… geez. I had to literally carry him all throughout the first set and that was not a pretty sight. We lost 4-6 first set. The second set.. he somewhat got better and well, we managed toe-to-toe. We managed to slightly edge them the second set, 7-5. me and marc were getting very confident that we could take down our opponents easily now because we thought they were fatigued. We thought wrong. They continued to resist us the third and final set. In the end, however, we won victoriously, 6-4. I was proud that I never gave up and we won in the end despite the shady calls of our opponents.

Monday: Well, this day sucked because I accidentally missed one mod of my English class. I swear.. I got a detention (actually 2) so yeah, its not a good day for me. But on the upside, I am playing tennis Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I’m so happy. ^_^

Tuesday: Sarah Murray, me, allie, and the “family tree.” That’s all I need to say for now. Lmao!! XDD

3:58pm: wow, i need to update O_O
so, yeah, its been a while since ive updated here so i think i need to get my current thoughts down now or else im gonna explode. >__> so, yeah, my computer at the moment is being gay (and course, its old as hell: 7 years to be exact)and the monitor wont turn on so im a bit grounded at the moment. so moving on to what has happened recently..

these two girls keep flirting with me and i hate it. they are dumb fucking sluts. they try to fucking use me for my answers and hw. just screw it .^#$*&^(^ anywho, i havent talked to many ppl lately that i usually talk to.. *cough* however, i have been in a very good and hyper mood. dont think my emo side has ever taken control since... a week ago? maybe.. so, yeah, im quite happy with that development.

been much move involved in tennis lately and i havent had much time to myslef lately. yes! lol so, yeah, i had a tennis match in columbia and i won both my matches. the first was pretty nerve-breaking cuz it was a first time in a while i had competition. i won 6-2,6-0 in the first match. i was so happy! the second match went in my favor, 6-2,7-5. whew! it was a close one.. so, now.. im here, training my heart out. lol so, gonna chill now. cya later!

6:35pm: gotta get serious..
yeah, tennis is gonna get much more serious for me. i think its time to finally get serious about it cuz i think i have too much free time on my hands.. i really need to improve. but yea, more about that later...

soo, lets see.. where shall i start? 2day was pretty good. esp when about two of my classes were changed due to the enormous amount of ppl involved in the play, Tom Sawyer. During my mods off, hung out with my friends and well, pat mcquaid was playing his violin for everyone.. (not that anyone was sophisticated to listen to it psh) i'm just getting worried that pat is entering that phase where ppl sell their soul to gain attention... i hope that passes quickly for him. ever since he joined water polo, hes changed.. for the worse.. i hate to say that. now that he associates with the ppl i solely hate, hes slowly becoming like them.. (far from it of course.) i was like that b4.. that is until i realized that i was slowly degrading myself.. my friend hugh, hes in that phase.. where he sings for everyone on demand.. its sickening, i swear. im just glad i got out of that phase this year. ooookk.. thats enough ranting on that there.. moving on.

en la clase de espanol, miramos una pelicula de looney tunes en espanol. me divierto mucho! Miramos la pelicula porque diez personas de la teatro estan ausente. (English Translation: In spanish class, we watched a looney tunes movie. I had a lot of fun! We watched the movie because 10 people from the play were absent.) I just love spanish! XD

In chem, well, our teacher had to drop her son off at the doctor's cuz he was due for a check-up. so she let us off the rest of the day and omg, we all needed that. i was in the cafeteria finishing up any hw i had.. so, now, i have nothing to worry about for the weekend. course, after school was almost a disaster. luckily my friend matt was out there with me and keeping me company.. otherwise.. lets not go there.. lol my friend jordan stood me up when we were supposed to have a tennis match.. im gonna kill him. so, yeah, just spent sum time around the school campus enjoying the fresh, crisp Fall air. gave me more time to myself than expected.. and dammit, i hate it when i have spare time to myself.

tennis was pretty horrible as i played horribly. lol course, im joining the rec league 2moro night where i can improve by playing the best of the best in the state. im sooo excited! ^_^ yeah, also, my coach, mr. bill, recommended me for some private lessons soon. at this rate, i will be able to make my current goal come true: drown myself in tennis so that way i wont hae any spare time to myself. im gonna put all that time to work. thats great! so, yeah, 2moro is my 1st match in the rec league at columbia. hope i do well.. well, thats all for now.. cya!

9:04am: HEY! TOM SAWYER! (aka steve douglas) ^_^
omg. that was a great preview of the play.. im gonna see it!!



YEAH!!!

11:32pm: Lies...
so, fate has betrayed me again. i have believed a bunch of lies once again... the worst lie ive ever had to deal with.. ugh, i dont want to even go there again. love is a lie. thats all i need to say. i give up on ever trying. i just can't trust anyone these days... i can't even trust myself. i keep looking at the jerks who have gfs and i just want to run off a cliff or just scream my fucking head off!

tsh, yeah, some life this is cracked up to be. oh well, i plan to leave all of this behind.. my past was nothing to hold on to. so im gonna cut all ties to the past when i go to college. who cares? thats the point. no one does. no one's going to stop me. no one will ever care about me.

just screw relationships and every sort of shit that comes with it. screw it all. i never
was, am, or will be happy in my life. ive screwed up too many times that i can count. ive lost friends... ive alienated many. and all have deserted me. yeah, this is such a promising time in my life now...


however, i do have one person that i can trust.. my little sister, ashley. she seems to be the most innocent and purest out of anyone ive ever met. at all. so im sorry, but this has got to be addressed. whatever, im done with this post. good-bye.

2:55pm: Will Baetz in Study Hall??!!
what the heck is this world coming to?? my too-smart-to-be-a-human friend, will baetz, is in study hall cuz he forgot his hw! that doesnt happen in my lifetime at all!! lmao so yea, that was a highlight of my day there. hung out with my friend, alli, for a good while talking about some stuff here and there.. now to other events that happened recently.

Monday: Critzer came by for a visit from FL. (he moved out last year.) hes a pretty good friend of mine and well, it was a sight to see him here for once. We caught up on old times and we tried to both look for eleni, the one girl that we both loved to torment *cough* i mean talk to. had to do my spanish oral exam with a recorder... i froze for like 3 seconds..(seemed more like a minute though) i hope I did well on that. My friend, pat schaefer, yelled crap really loud on the recorder...mwahahaha!

9:02pm: deja vu all over again...
well, heres my 2nd post for the day. lol yea.. this day started off horrible as i almost slept thru the entire morning... missing all of my shows! >_<;; 2day was the day of my performance.. i made sure not to make those 9 hours of practice go to waste 2day.. >__> i swear there was a whole bunch of bad karma out to get me.. i forgot my music at my house... course, i had remembered most of my music so it wasnt so bad at 1st. then, byron and christy came later than they were told to and byron was in charge of getting my vest and tie for the concert. so, yeah, i was nervous for a while.. byron was surely a sight for sore eyes when he arrived.. he gave me a black folder for my music.. which wuda been cool, if i had brought my music.. *cough* so yeah, the practice was really good.. my next mistake was getting a soda instead of water to parch my thirst. bad thing... you singers know that for a fact! so, yeah.. then, at the time of the performance... i left my folder on the balcony.. thats great. yeah, the performance itself wasnt such a bad thing... i sung pretty well. afterwards, i got sum pizza! yays! ^_^ pizza good...very yummy! in my tummy! hehe nuff of that. went to a party that was mostly for little kids.. kept myself busy until i had to leave. then, i had to go to church, where there was a very brilliant surprise waiting for me.

My old friend, Jessica, was there. She was doing the readings and well, she did a pretty good job of it if i must say so myself. We didn't really get to connect until we saw each other in the lines for Communion. I swear i was helluva scared. We both just smiled and that was it. My parents were hassling me all about it the way home and that put me in a piss-off mood. thats pretty much it. laters!

11:40am: My most recent poem...
well, it seems like im getting back into the spirit of poetry these days. i was afraid i had lost it soo long ago. well, heres a new one for all of you to tackle. im making up a new format... let me know if u like it ^_^

What is one aspect in life that everyone has?
What is it that everyone hates?
What is it that life revolves around?
What is it that spurs one's doubts?
What is that one thing that hides in the shadows?
What is that one thing makes friends strangers?
What is just as bad as lies?
What's that one thing that makes us vulnerable?
What's that one thing thrives off our fear?
What makes us hesitate?
I'll tell you if you can tell me.

theres more to this poem which contains the answer. also the title is the answer. figure it out and let me know.

7:49pm: towson chorus rehearsals!
as of this moment, my mouth and esp my throat is totally shot. lol thats what u get for singing high for almost 9 hours! o_o so yeah, i was off school 2day, but of course that didnt mean i had something to do 2day. had to go to towson university and go to the rehearsals for the chorus festival performance 2moro! ^_^ ^_^ 2day felt like my chorus homeroom being streched out the ennntiiirreee day! course, it was fun and i met a ton of new ppl. considering it was a chorus composed of many schools from all over the state... its easy to make sum awesome friends! met sum from perryville high and several more... (bel air high including) byron & christy also went there so i didnt feel totally alone. and also, another unexpected friend i knew was there... greg hoyce. he goes to north harford and omg, he is super good and his voice is so cool! (geez, i wud kill to have a voice like his...) he auditioned for the master class where only the elite singers could take part. he made it 2nd out of 13 incredible singers... (i am small fry compared to them... v___v) so, yeah, we caught up on old times for quite a while b4 practice started.

the warm-ups were ridiculous, but i guess it was meant to put us in the mood to sing. so, learned 5 pieces of music... (which really means repeating several words all throughout the entire song.. lol) i found out that i had supposed to get those pieces of music a long time ago.. and i was sooo pissed. i had to learn it 2day whereas most ppl had already memorized it! sumhow, i caught up and managed to keep on key and in rhythm with all of the songs. i felt really happy and also, it seems that my singing voice was higher than expected. i found myself reaching notes i never could reach b4. i swear.. all i need to hav is sum decent singers next to me and the chorus of 150 ppl was really, really good...so that helped a lot.

lunch was incredible as it was buffet style and they had a wide (and i mean wide) variety of food to choose from. (can someone say feeding frenzy??) met another girl there, mackenzie, and we both had a blast. she went to patapsco high school. also met a guy named henry there and well, he was about equal to byron in crack-ups.

byron: henry, what did I tell you about smoking pot during school?
Henry: I only smoked it during math class!

ROFLMAO! such good times there. headed deeper into the towson university campus. we went to the place where we wud perform 2moro afternoon. not too bad.. course, my auditiorium was about twice the size of its stage... but whatever. spent sum time there singing, practicing, and getting into whatever trouble we could. *cough* afterwards, 5:00... amazing how fast that went. well, all 4 now. gotta ice my throat or something... hehehe cya!

6:29pm: football antics... >___>
well, 2day was very... different. *cough* one thing i need to mention is that JC is off 2moro and u non-JC ppl arent! HAH! *runs away from angry mob* not like it really matters since all of u were practically off last firday... *ahem*

anywho, had a pretty good day 2day... had off practically half the entire day. one of my really good days out of any week. Hung out with Cory the 1st couple of mods and played sum cards. got caught by mrs. gauthier but didnt get into any trouble.. luckily. then, had lunch after a few more classes... they got back the old chicken!! *hugs chicken and then eats it* omg, i thought id be stuck eating those "plastic" chicken versions... >___> so, yeah, since i get free food, i definitely cudnt pass up a feeding frenzy at all costs! taunted jordan fritz, basta, matt cochran, and cory.. got a big kick outta that for sure! then, chemistry wasnt so bad as my test had been moved to monday. *whew* world history was priceless as two ppl i dislike (they havent reached the status of 'hate' that some ppl have reached) so much got detentions for disrupting the class. *yes!!* 2day was a breeze for me.. course, i have so much stuff due next week: a spanish oral exam..an english project.. big chemistry test..creative writing...occasional homework.. u kno, the works. lol but oh well..

hung out with tim at the end of the day...and thats always fun, no matter when. talked to sandy and kelly for a while, telling them how tim and jenn brown broke up and tim's mistress had run away. actually, tim's son aka me ran off with her... hehehehe (if u dont get this, i dont blame u. its really an inside joke. roflmao) after creeping out sandy and kelly, we stalked them for a while to scare them sum more, we went to the football field. observed sum football warm-ups and our opponents at that time. (*whisper* tim, we're gonna get killed again!) those guys were huge! they must be on steroids or something.. im sure that we were killed. (hell, im supposed to be rooting for JC... see how bad our football team really is?? lol) sat and watched them sum more as we counted 10 missed catches during practice.. wow, that sucks. me and tim wanted to be the first male cheerleaders too.. dont bother asking why.. hahaha anywho, sum of the warm-ups were unsettling. i dont dare go into details... lmao! (tim: they take it from behind! sooo.. this is what they do "off-football season"... *whisper*) *falls over chair laughing* there was no way id ever live that down. i swer i know i was on something... afterwards, went home and im panicking right now cuz im not sure about some details for 2moro's plans...arghh, well, im gonna go. cya guys!

7:14pm: Junior Retreat Reflection
As this retreat came to and end, it had offeted me so many opportunities to re-evaluate my life and the most important aspects have shown themselves so clearly. I now know how much my life means to me and I never took the time until now to realize it all. I'm so happy to have my friends, family, and everyone else that's helped me to shape how I am. Friendship has gotten so much more important to me as I have had the time to talk with my closest friends. I've realized how lucky I am to have all these blessings bestowed upon me. I now see my previous actions as brash and unfeeling. My friends really do care for me. I really have friends. Life is so precious and never should be taken for granted at any time. I've taken many things into consideration, but I never really really was thankful for them all. Life can be cut short and if you've never really got to say thanks to yout parents, your friends...then, that would be a shame and a major loss for you and everyone in your life. and so, i took the time to say this to all of my close and best friends:

Allie: Thank you for being my friend. You were the one that pushed me to make the best of my life. I couldn't have asked for a better friend at all. You pushed me into things that I was scared to go in alone. But with you, I didn't feel so scared and lonely. I felt as if I could trust you with anything. Thank you for everything you've done for me. You are the best!

Steph: Steph, you are an incredible person. You really brought up my personality and confidence higher than anyone I ever thought was possible. I hope we continue to stay friends all throughout my life. You helped me to feel emotions and thoughts that I was afraid that I had lost. You helped me to dig up all the feelings I had buried not so long ago. I'm so glad that I have met you; thanks for being one of my closest friends.

Christina: Tina, thanks for giving me such happiness for the first time in my life. I could never forget the times we had together and I never will. I'm sorry for giving you such grief recently and I'm sorry for not talking to you as much. I guess my emotions still has some sort of control over me. I hope we can still be friends. I never want to lose one of my best friends that I ever had.

Charles: Charles, you're so cool man! No one can show so much finesse in DDR than you. Thanks for listening to all my problems and for coping with me all this time. You've helped me walk through some of the hardest choices in my life. You were always there for to talk to, either online or in person. I hope I can be there as you have for me. I 'm so glad to have you as my friend.

Tim: Thanks for being there for me. You akways knew what to say at that moment to cheer me up whether it be a joke or you hitting me... >_<;; You've helped me to strive despite all of my troubles. It's not a surprise that you and Allie go so well. You two love to help people like me... (its soo cute btws.. hahaha) A word of warning: Hurt her and I'll hurt you!! XDD Thanks for being all a friend can be.

Matt: Matt, you're a genius for sure! Thanks for being there and making me stop and think about the decisions I almost fatally made. You make me laugh and you always try to go out of your way to hang around with me whether it be before, during, or even after school. You're such a good friend and I hope we remain best friends forever. (I need to be good friends with someone rich anyways... j.k)

Alana: You are one of my closest friends. You've believed in me and saw so many things that others didnt even bother to see. You surely have done a lot for me; I greatly appreciate it. Thank you for listening to me, making me laugh, and being such a good friend to me.

To everyone else not mentioned: all of you guys are great. you always cheer me up and give me something to do. In times of sadness, you kept your distance but I knew you still cared. You guys... all of you mean a lot to me. (you're just not special enough to be specifically mentioned, thats all XPPP)

I never realized how hard friends could come by. True friends are even harder to come by. I', happy to both have friends and true friends alike. Everyone, thanks for everything.

9:37pm: utter confusion...
damn, there is soo much confusion now that there are more ppl than ever calling my cell fone these days. (dont get me wrong. i lik that, i just dont want to end up mixing up ppl and offending them...) so, here we go with the post about my busy weekend.

saturday was very cool as i saw soo many of my old childhood friends. ^_^ ^_^ alexis & arty, krystal & kia. all of them being my godbrother and godsisters. funfun! i was supposed to go to NJ for my cousin, Kristian's, bday but i ended up not going for the length of distance going there... 3 hours. so, yeah, the party ended up being a drag at 1st but that didnt last long when we started playing cards and playing some of my favorite games: capitalism (or revolutions as some call it), crazy 8's, blackjack, egyptian ratscrew (interesting card name, eh?), and a filipino favorite, monkey, monkey. so, the entire night was really fun and there was sum decent line dancing going on, so i joined in. i cudnt resist anyways. XDD so, that night was fine when alana, a very good friend of mine, called. course, with my stupid, cracked cell fone , i thought it was steph.. the voices were very similar. so i ended up confusing alana with steph. that pissed me off a lot at 1st but i got over it. it wasnt long afterwards that i ended up leaving that party... at around 12 that is. i also heard that on our way there to the party, there were like 11 seperate accidents on I-95.. omg, that was soo horrible to hear. i hope everyone was ok there.

sunday... well, i went to NJ... the day AFTER the party itself... *mumbles* wished my cousin a happy birthday and hung out with him for a while. then, his godbrothers and godsisters came over as well. i tried getting my friend jill, a godsister of his and a very good friend of mine, to come over but she cudnt come over... rawr. another setback but oh well. chilled and talked with my favorite uncles and aunts there as well and greeting my grandma a happy birthday as well. (my cousin's and my grandma's birthday is on the same birthday. talk about a predicament.. >_<) so, yeah, on my way back to MD, my cell fone rang and i thought it was steph yet again. (allie, shut up. yea, i think about her... not all the time though... >___>) then, when she said NJ, i thought it was alana.. wrong again. it was jill. -_______- my gosh, i was tearing my hair out... we talked for like an hour on the fone and caught up on things. afterwards, like two hours later... my cell fone rings yet again. this time, i wasnt expecting steph to call but it turned out to be her. (at this moment, i was about to throw my cell fone out the window onto I-95...) i was really happy to get to talk to her but of course, Chicago was faaaar more interesting than talking to me so we hung up the conversation promptly. hehehe well, thats pretty much it. i need to write more on my junior retreat. laters!

10:42pm: iceworld and allie's birthday! (double whammy!)
well, 2nite was very interesting... (Cuda been better if not for *ahem* and all, but yeah. XDD) so, yeah, went to iceworld for allie's bday and it also happened to fall on a friday.. (iceworld friday that is.. hehehe) so, yeah, headed over there at around 7:30. met pat schaefer at the door and the rest of the gang was already there. (i luv to be fashionably late) got my skates and well, decided to fill in that one person how things were going.. *cough & looks away* so, yea, headed right for the ice immediately and i got my "ice-legs" back in action in about 3 minutes tops! (an amazing feat for me if u ask me.. lol) so, as i was trying to familiarize myself with the ice and all, i wasn't really feeling myself. I felt idk..different: not myself.. *shrugs* i didnt let it show cuz well, it was allie's bday.. its supposed to be happy! tried my best i can to keep it supressed and not worry any1 like usual. (and sides, i know people dont ever want to hear my ranting and venting to them personally.. i know that fact allll too well..) so, skated to my heart's content and took a rest. course when ppl saw me sitting out, they assumed something was wrong..(damn my usual personality) i was talking with pat schaefer most of the night and with charles the rest of the time. those two are pretty good company and i cud not ask for more at all.. lets see.. who else was there? alright heres the list: allie, tim, charles, heiddi, pat, me, phil, caroline, lauren, and christina. we were all paired off in little groups and occasionally, we wud all gather together. cept me, i wud try to avoid those this evening. i just wanted to be alone that night and just stay a loner for as long as i could. course, that was almost virtually impossible with the gang there. I just loved to skate so i cud be free on my own and just let it all slip away. course, one thing kept coming back to me.. (actually, several things..) but yeah, skated most of the time.. not really any songs worth mentioning 2nite.. i think thats pretty much it. catch ya guys later.

7:19pm: built-up anticipation
today was one of my worst days. i was in a bitter mood for practically half the day... possibly more. however, the day started off way too much fun as i accidentally spilled my bottle of water and wet some of the other ppl's books. >_____< guzman was telling me how to "properly" wipe up a mess.. (cory: uve had more than enuff experience, havent u?? roflmao!!) so, yeah, he got pissed at me and almost choked me but whatever he cant kill me. im immortal! mwahaahaha! oookkayyy... kevin's being too weird 2day.. *cough* i made sure i got the wet napkin and gave what guzman said "a soggy pants" LOL so, yeah, me and cory played sum card games in the meanwhile. but yeah, afterwards, the rest of the day went sour. ppl were stealing food from me... (every1 that knos me that food is important to me and shall die if caught..), ppl were asking favors of me concerning food... rawr. and dammit, ppl were pissing me off overall. i went thru the rest of the day with a pessimistic view of the world. (die all of u! rawr) so, yeah, thats pretty much the day 2day. i just cant wait to go to iceworld 2moro for allie's birthday! eeee!! its too bad that steph cant come. i wont have someone to stalk *cough* i mean talk with the entireee night. *sobs* oh well, i'll make do by doing what i do best... being a loner. well, catch ya guys later..

6:55pm: a dreaded week indeed
well, a lot's going on this week. we've got PSAT's 2moro. x____x consider us all toast. so, yeah, its kinda scary for all of us esp those who luuuuv to procrastinate til the morning of it. *raises hand* hehehe good luck to every1 on those. now, on to the good news of this post though. XD

2day was pretty good cuz mrs. smith, our fav librarian, came back after mourning the death of her husband. we were all soooo happy to see her again cuz we havent seen her in like a month or so and well, things were hell in the library without her. XP ted, tom, bruce, and several of us all went to the library all in one group.. (surprisingly, we werent in our angry mob mood or something of the sort. *cough* ;>___>) so, yeah, that was a BIG plus for all of us. afterwards, after school, hung out with john, a freshmen friend, and played sum cards. course, i hear music in the gym and they start playing LP, which is alright by me but they played reanimation... which is an almost complete disgrace and insult to the Hybrid Theory album. i was soo mad that i walked up to all of them and started yelling at them. then, they gave me a mean glare and i ran. lmao it was all fun. allie walked up to me several times and started bugging me about several things: the usual *ahem*, HYO, recent case of happiness... (need i say more or can u connect the dots? hahaha) stephish called me later on which was a good surprise as usual. she laughed at me for playing the card game that she oh loves to mock me about. *cough* so, yeah, she hung up on me cuz of that.. rawr, i need to call her back and yell at her! pretty much it i guess. catch ya guys later!