How to order pizza? [12th December 2003|11:16] 1) Decide what kind of pizza I want. 2) Pull out all the fliers we got and check netpincer.hu 3) Look for sizes/prices of desired pizza. 4) Since sizes vary, calculate area of actual pizza in cm2 (use 3,14 x r2 where r is the radius of the circle, that is half of the size of the pizza on the paper) 5) Divide price by area. 6) Compare results. 7) Order cheapest. 1 dream|share your dream

[9th November 2003|13:37] Today is another good day. I finally convinced myself that I can try to work with PSP. I am not really good, but I think I am in the mood to pick things up. And I am also in the mood to post pictures, lotsa lotsa pictures. So what are these pictures? These are two shots form a movie called God's Army. It was made by wonderful film maker Richard Dutcher, who is now considered the founder of independent Mormon cinema. The movie was turned into a novel by Geoffrey Card, son of science fiction/fantasy writer Orson Scott Card. I have to admit that I originally hated the film. Elder Dalton was someone I tried to be like, but never managed to be. Dalton, played by Dutcher, is The Missionary, and as a missionary I wanted to be like him. But alas, I failed. What scared me more than anything was that Dalton's story could have been mine. Easily. I did not see the film before my mission, which might be strange, but recently, as I have gotten forther away from the Church, I gradually grew to love the film and now the novel. The point is, however, that I have been playing with PSP. So check the pics, and when you hover over the image... You get the whole quote! ( Now the images ) 1 dream|share your dream

[15th September 2003|09:53] My CI is now working, meaning... I can hear things! Yay! It was turned on yesterday, and the first mapping gave me a headache. Actually it made me dizzy and I had to puke twice during the process which was absolutely my brain's fault. Anyway, sounds as of now are weird. My C level was not done right, but that can be fixed today. Yes, another map will be today. I am alll excited about that. Right now some vowels....vovels...wovels.... well, so sounds that sound... weird. Like the ee sound, the s, sh, z, the ö.... "Dunno, it is just weird," as Drib would say! Mentioning Drib, I have an LJ code for you. And the music sounds so metallic, and I am NOT talking about Metallica and Aerosmith. So that will need more adjustment. So soon it will be instead of ! 1 dream|share your dream

[29th August 2003|11:29] It is around 11:30 a.m. and I am getting a monster headache. Last night lights out was at 11, but I remember looking at my watch at 12:30 a.m. And this morning I woke up at 5. I tried to go back to sleep, but I gave up and came online around 5:40 a.m. I have tried going back to bed a little while back, but there are too many things going on. Curiosity killed the cat. It is killing me too. And the headache. And the food here. And just being a whiny bastard. I'm sure the nurses will kill me soon. I am just having a pounding headache and I want it to go away. Why can't I just sleep??? 4 dreams|share your dream

[25th August 2003|18:32] Derek's surgery was a success. He is asleep again. :-) The biopsy was negative. :-) Daniel 2 dreams|share your dream

Icon making and the such. Formula 1. [24th August 2003|14:07] So I decided that the icon making competitions that are based on a PICTURE are no good for me. I don't get inspired. I have to search out my own photos and images to start with, I just cannot relate to certain pics. My brain just won't start working at times. And I have to remember that when you post an icon on a comminity behind a cut on Caleida it will be on a white background (unlike using it normally) so I have to be careful about that as well. However the concept is this, make an icon type communities are totally cool. I like those. Today is the Hungarian Grand Prix of Formula One. One of the Jordan pilots was injured the other day, so Hungarian Zsolt Baumgartner is in the race to replace him. He is the first ever Hungarian to participate in a Formula 1 race. And it happens here, in Hungary. How cool for him! By the way I'll be gone for a few days. share your dream

[21st August 2003|13:13] The last few weeks we have had two visits by the local Elders' Quorum president, the Primary teacher of my son and the branch mission leader. And there have been thoughts. I have been called to repent and give up my sinful lifestyle and return to the Church. Leave Kevin, leave my life, leave Craig, break up a famly that is not healthy and repent, get rebaptized and be happy in the gospel of Christ. One thing that reminds me of was that when my friend's parents got a divorce because the bishop told his mother that she should repent from marrying a non member and she would be better off without a husband than with a non member. How bad was that? Bad. Okay, suppose I leave Kevin. So here is what would happen. I'd lose the love of my life for a Church. Okay, let's say for the Gospel. I'd leave Craig who already has a hard time trusting adults--he has been left one too many times already. He loves me, trusts me and considers me to be a parent. I'd lose the twins as I am not capable of taking care of two children by myself. They'd end up being raised by someone who most likely would want to take them clear across the world from me. And with being back in the Church I'd still be second class member--a single guy without the blessings of a Temple marriage. A would never be able to love a woman the way she deserves, and yes, in that sex is included. I have my doubts (reasonable doubts) about my possible performance in bed. Well, maybe if I had sinful thoughts of other men, but then again, I am a sinner and will not make it to the highest glory for having them. Finally I'd end up as a miderable, lonely old man, who has no one but his cats and when I die no one finds me for weeks. And once I'm dead... Well, the best that can happen is that I become a serving angel, being a second class citizen of the CK again, lonely, sepearated from the man I love. Is it worth it? 7 dreams|share your dream

[20th August 2003|14:20] Today is a National Holiday in Hungary. It is the celebration of St. Stephen, Hungary's first king, who brought about the Christianization and European formation of the country, thus, in addition to the Catholic holiday it is the Nation's birthday as well as Constitution day, as well as the New Bread's Celebration. In Budapest there was a great free concert: a 4,000 voice choir and an orchestra of 250 were playing on Hösök tere (aka Heroes' Square). The Prime Minister gave a speech there. Today there are parades (a water parade in Budapest) and fireworks. The Budapest one is traditionally at least 30 minutes long and is started from Gellért Hill on the Buda side. Most of the quay-side is jam packed with people watching it... It starts filling up around 4 p.m. and afterthe fireworks at 9 there are still concerts all over. So much fun for everyone. Jim took the kids to the local celebrations.... It is only Kevin and me home... some time for us to talk, som etime to share fears and joys. Monday... share your dream

[20th August 2003|10:58] Okay, so depression is setting in. Well, more like this immense fear. I know I shouldn't be scared or afraid of the upcoming surgery, I had ones like this one on Monday and I always made it. And yet I am scared. What if it turns out to be malignant? What is the surgery doesn't go as it is expected? To cheer myself up I made Ghaleon's Deadly Chocolate Pudding, minus the corn starch to make EXCELLENT drinking chocolate. I made chips to go with it. (Americans: fries. Formerly known as French.) I have to say that everyone should go and try that recipe. It is EXCELLENT. Thank you, Thursday for telling me about it. I need to make another dose. I need something to give me courage. 2 dreams|share your dream

[20th August 2003|08:30] August 20... Today fireworks. Today holida. Today country happy. share your dream

[19th August 2003|23:12] Did everyone check my MRI results? No? Then please go back and entry and do it. It is FUNNY! Thank you, Michael. Ok, so really, I had an MRI today. And I wasn't gonna tell the world the results. But I think i am feeling more comfortable about iot. There is a small tumour where the last one was. So right on, Bowling Head! Get the laser out and make it one of those miracolous (sp?) disappearances. In other words, don't worry. It is small. I'm big, Who is more likely to win??? 1 dream|share your dream

[19th August 2003|13:16] Had an MRI today. For the results ( click here )( Who said I wasn't nuts???? ) 2 dreams|share your dream

[18th August 2003|12:34] First the Psychic reader. Please try it. ( Click for the trick ) 2 dreams|share your dream

Chocolate chicken [18th August 2003|07:40] Someone checked my layout here and saw the Likes: Chocolate, chicken, fish line and they asked me what chocolate chicken was like? Hmm, I should try that. Chocolate chicken with candy corn.... I got up at 7 a.m. (after falling asleep at 4 a.m.) to see if Michael was online. No. He wasn't. I got an e-mail from him, though, so I know he is alive! I tried going back to sleep but it didn't work. I got up again, made tea and tried going back to bed. But littleprince was spread out on my bed. How funny. Such a small kid taking up such a big bed! So I am up. Probably toying around with an icon for icontest_ or something. Hoping that someone will talk to me. 4 dreams|share your dream

[17th August 2003|21:28] The cast was taken off today. Just before Kevin and the kids got home. Craig came in, undressed, went out to swim, then had dinner. He was more excited about the pool than Disney. Kevin and he kept doing his diary for speech therapy. The idea behind it is that it contains evernts that are important and interesting to the kid, not the parents. Guess what they drew and wrote about these three days? The jam they got on the flight, getting a little orange coloured fan and the bug he found on the balcony and not a word about Disney! share your dream

[17th August 2003|12:34] So yes, the verdict is final, the last CT is indecisive, the many seizures and the fact that my coordination is even worse than it used to be, not to mention the recurring headaches all point to one direction. MRI Tuesday morning 7:30 a.m. I am scared. I had several occasions being in remission. None lasted this long. Almost two months now. Please, let me be just clumsy, stupid, retarded, anything... But please, God, don't play any more tricks on me. I'm tired. I'm scared. I need to take care of my family. I am selfish. 2 dreams|share your dream

Hi! [15th August 2003|15:36] I'm an absolute Journalwhore. For my most frequently updated journals check my layout. I am also present on UJ, NeedlessPanic, Insane Journal, Weedweb, Dead Journal, LJ, Blurty, AML, melo and wherever. Nice to be here. 7 dreams|share your dream

[15th August 2003|08:17] The house will be empty this weekend.... A friend of ours from home (ie.: Ireland) traded a long weekend in EuroDisney he won at some company function for ten days in our summer home by Lake Balaton with us. So tomorrow morning Kevin is taking Craig and Hannah to EuroDisney. This is going to be a total surprise for the kids. I am sure they'll love it, even if Craig couldn't care less about Disney cartoons. This reminds me of my first trip to Disneyland. It was when I was 5. I was an ugly kid with a big bald head (baldness.... How I hate being bald. It think it started with that trip) and a big crush on Minnie... I actually proposed to Minnie Mouse! I even took a ring and everything. I have to admit that Minnie started to laugh hysterically under her big plastic head as soon as we left. I am not sure if I deserved that, but it taught me to be careful with women, even if they are giant mice. That is one story I have to tell Craig. We have been talking about serious things these days. Several times a day he climbs on my bed to talk, and asks questions I wouldn't expect from a child like him. Today we were talking about his mummy. His mother died in an accident when he was only 7 months old. He doesn't remember her at all. I don't know much about her, but I told him what I know. We were looking at her picture and I think this conversation will continue with Dad there. Talking about Craig... He is so funny, he loves updating his Caleida Journal. Now he wants his own layout. I am so not talented with those, I have no idea what to do.... Any creative style makers out there.... HELP! share your dream

[25th July 2003|18:03] Most of my life I was the kid who runs. I was running everywhere, except when I was riding my bike. I ran in the mornings, I jogged to art class and music lessons. I was the kid who was doing everything. I was the one that played the violin at concerts and weddings, I was the one who spent the nights drawing and painting. I was the weirdo, who went skiing, snowboarding, rock climbing, triathlon races, did all the weird stuff. I was singing, One night when I was 18 I went to bed after a full day. I woke up two weeks later. I woke up not being able to use the right side of my body, not being able to speak, swallow or control body functions. Then I didn't know what was wrong. It was only 8-9 months later that the cause was found. I have never been able to accept the fact that I am disabled. I cannot give up hope that I will be the way I was 3 years ago. I want to run again, I want to sing again and it is just not possible that I shall never draw again. I want to run in the Olympics, I want to play my violin again, it is just impossible that I won't be able to use my hand for these things again. I want to be smart again, the way I was. When I think of myself I think of the Derek from 3 years ago. When I look into the mirror and see myself I get sick to my stomach and the tears start running. I cannot accept the reality as it is. The past three years I have worked so hard on learning to walk again, learning to speak again. Every little improvement was earned by sweat and blood, only for a setback to occur so I can fall deeper than where I was climbing out from. I hate the stairs. I hate how people talk over my head. I hate how people pity Kevin for having to live with me. I hate it when I disappoint people. I hate it when I need the help of people who see me as a retard. I hate it when people don't let me do what I can do. I hate being me. I am working every day to walk, to be able to take care of my children, to be able to teache them the things I learnt rom my dad. I want to change. share your dream

[24th July 2003|21:16] Today after my hospital appointment we stopped for ice cream at McDonald's. Craig went to play with two little girls about his own age--4 or 5 I would say--and all of a sudden he ran back to us, craying and then the girls came after him, yelling "Fags" and "Pervs". I was surprised girls knew these words. I was surprised that they were yelling at us in public. I was surprised their parents did not do anything. Craig was very upset. I so don't want him to be ashamed of his family. 2 dreams|share your dream

[2nd July 2003|15:48] First entry here.... 2 dreams|share your dream