| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Interpol and Jimmy Eat World |
] |
Too bad my last post was probably the best post ever and I doubt anyone gets it. -wails- I wasn't going to post today, because I love my last post so much, but boredom took over me and I found myself just itching to type. I'm going to make those kind of posts more often. Picture/lyric posts that are just so completely emo. Even though the lyrics in the post below do not belong to an emo band. -shrugs-
I despise my choir. I so wish I was in chorale, like all the cool talented kids. Everyone in Women's Ensemble just fucks around. And half of them can't distinguish the difference between a quarter note and a half note. Damn, I thought I was bad at sight reading, but some of these kids can't do shit. Its so frusterating because we seem to never get anything acomplished in that class. Its depressing, really. And I feel bad because my class doesnt seem to want to work at anything. I got a C on my last choir test though, and just about everyone else got high As. I'm trying not to let it bother me. I'm keeping in mind that atleast I know what an eighth note is. -tries not to get upset over a C- Moving on..
Its funny that "emo" isn't recognized in spell check on LJ. I mean, come on, that word is used so often on LJ I can't understand why they don't include it.
D___ stood so close to me today and I about melted. It was in gym class, and he stood very close to me while we waited in line to kick [we were playing kick ball]. He was sweating, but all I could smell was his deodorant and his Cologne, if he was even wearing any [Cologne that is]. I want to just grab him by his shirt and kiss him right in the middle of gym class. But no. I didn't. If I did, I think I would really freak him out. Or disgust him. Aaah. I wish I could have him, just for a little while. Just go out for one intense month. And we'd end it right-unlike my other so called relationships.
All the sudden, I realized when I started actually listening to a lot of "emo" music. After I got dumped. I turned emo. Damn! Hah.
My newest attraction is smart boys. I love boys who are mega intelligent. Though, I find myself being very frightend of them. I'm afraid to talk to them, in fear that I won't be able to hold a nice, intelligent conversation with them...without mentioning fernz, sex, blow jobs, or cum. damn. Thats why I don't think D____ would ever like me because:
1) I am disgusting. If you know me, then you should know this statment to be true. I have a tendancy to do gross things, think gross thoughts, and eat gross things.
2) I am weird. Not your average weird, but your "I cut my cuticles everyday until they bleed because I have a growing hatred of cuticles and nails" weird, or the "I had an unhealthy obsession with Rasputin" weird and you have to include the "I like to take toe nail clippers and clip off bits of skin on my arm" weird. Speaking of cuticles, I have to go slice them off soon.
3) He is so much more talented than me.
And thats all I can muster at the moment. I'm trying to be positive today and save the self loathing commetns for later!
For tomorrow is the glorious Turkey Day! A fabulous day where I get to sit around with my awesome cousins and stuff my mouth with bird and laugh about the good times. Yes, there were actually good times.
Me and Jess used to make our beanie babies have sex with each other. When we were 7. -cough-
There are certain people who I just want to take in my arms and shelter from the cruel world. Because those certain people are so extremely nice and innocent, that I wouldn't want anything to harm them. Not that my little arms could do much protection, but its worth a try :)
Well, I have come to the realization that I have been rambling on.
So I bid you farwell.
For a few days.
All my love-
Agent Emo.
|
thankful
cold
weird
bouncy