Neville's Pensive [entries|friends|calendar] Neville Longbottom [ userinfo | userinfo ] [ calendar | calendar ]

[12 Aug 2003|02:43am] [ mood | sick ] It's been a while since I've written in this journal. I know how Ginny must've felt when she was in the infirmary, as I've been under the weather lately. Since I'm not feeling too well I've have been spending most of my time in bed, reading. I haven't seen much of anyone, even Harry. I've still been keeping my eyes peeled in the books I got from the library, I wonder if Harry has found anything interesting in the ones he checked out. Hopefully I'll write more once I'm feeling better. 2 remembered| forget me not

reply from Neville's uncle. [15 Jul 2003|10:18pm] I was rather suprised he replied so quickly. Then again he lives for this sort of thing, wether he wants to admit it or not. Still, I do wish that all the code in the letters was unneccessary. It is hard tying to write something only he would understand. Anyhow, he is sending the stuff. Its too big for owls, so he is arranging for its transport with Professor Dumbledore. He told me to open it in fron to people. Is he mad? Oh, I am sure he has disguised it perfectly, but still, you never can take any chances. Hopefully I will never need any of this stuff, but I sure will sleep better knowing it's here.

Owl to Neville's Uncle. [15 Jul 2003|01:50pm] ( Owl To Uncle ) forget me not

[15 Jul 2003|11:28am] [ mood | contemplative ] So much Drama these days, I am not sure quite what to make of it. Are people creating this drama so they don't have to think about what's really going on in the world outside of school? I know that for me at least, I have enough to worry about without all of these inter-personal squabbles, love triangles and other self manufactured tragedies. I suppose that is the benefit of being nearly invisible. I am not often drawn in to all of this. That's fine with me, but I suppose it is somewhat lonely. Oh well at least I have my plants to talk to. Still, I wish I really understood what was going on. I only hear bits and pieces of gossip. I would love to believe that I am above that, but curiosity gets the better of me I suppose, and I am starting to hate feeling out of the loop. All seems eerily quiet out in the real world. I read The Daily Prophet hoping to learn something, but relieved to not hear much. I am sure the Ministry is withholding a lot of news, but if anything big were to happen I would imagine it would get out. I shouldn't worry. I know that if there were an Azkaban breakout, I would hear about it. Gran would probably write me urging me to be ultra careful, and my "Uncle" would definitely send me a note if I were in any real danger. It's weird calling him uncle, I know he was a very close friend of my fathers, but he never seemed like an uncle to me. Perhaps it's because he seemed so frightening when I was young. Who am I kidding, he's still a little creepy. I am not sure why I have been so determined to not let on my relationship with him, even when he was here. I suppose it's for the same reason I have never really talked about my parents. I should tell them about my parents. They are all off on a damn fool quest to become Aurours. Sure it sounds glamorous, but they have not seen the realities, or not really comprehended them. I may come from a line of Aurours, but the line ends with me. My family has given enough. I'm no coward, but I want to leave a more peaceful life, and give back to society in a more healing role. Still, I respect those that would defend us. There will always be evil out there. If not Voldemort, then there are others almost as bad. Not as powerful, but just as evil. Damn, writing this makes me think about that damnned Lestrange woman again. Maybe I should send an owl to my uncle and see if he can send some of my fathers old things. He did after all teach me to use them this summer. 8 remembered| forget me not

[13 Jul 2003|06:53pm] [ mood | depressed ] Hmm, first days are going by quickly. I am keeping a low profile. Frankly, I am not sure I feel like talking to anyone. I am still having nightmares. I still hear that awful womans voice in my dreams. Harry says I should Talk to Sirius about my concerns, but I am not sure I can handle that just yet. I need to write a proposal for an independent study in Herbology for Professor sprout to approve. At least that will keep me busy. 1 remembered| forget me not

last nights dream [11 Jul 2003|05:41pm] Neville stretched out in his bed and drifted into sleep. The rhythmic sounds of the weird sisters filled the air, and his eyes were filled with visions of the great hall decorated to its finest. Neville felt the warmth and softness of a young woman against him, and realized that he was dancing. Of course he was dancing. It was the Yule ball. What else would I be doing?He thought.He could feel the weight of the girls head on his shoulder as he looked out at a sea of smiling faces. Perhaps they were smiling at him and his dance partner ,he thoughtbut then he stopped to wonder.. who exactly am I dancing with?The thought made him smile, he could definitely think of candidates he would choose. As the song came to a close, Neville looked up and saw the face of his dance partner. He saw the face of Bellatrix Lestrange. Neville awoke with a start. what an awful nightmare he thought. He for a second he wondered which was more horrible, seeing the Lestrange woman, or the prospect of the real Yule ball forget me not

[11 Jul 2003|02:48pm] I suppose this journal fad is a good thing. It certainly has its charm. In addition, I can easily carry it with me. I was rather apprehensive about the idea at first, given the problems I have had in the past writing down umm sensitive information. I suppose I should be rather careful what I write. On a personal note, I feel myself changing. I feel more confident in myself, and my abilities. I was frankly rather amazed at how well I did in DA classes with Harry, and that night.... I am not sure I am ready to talk about it, but amidst all the horror I surprised myself. What does it say about me that I found it rather thrilling, and I feel some sense of pride? On a much lighter note (if I may forgive myself the pun) I wonder if anyone will notice the weight I have lost. I am not quite where I would like to be, but I feel like a new man. 3 remembered| forget me not

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